Mirrored connections

The different people who come into our lives are a reflection of ourselves and the chapter of the journey we find ourselves in. People become a mirror, a reflection of who we are.

There are moments when we question why some people leave while others come in, often in the most random and spontaneous ways. We wonder why some people stop talking to us, why we lose touch, or how it is possible that someone you just met can become a person you connect with deeply. But other times, it is better to simply let it be—to not question it or search for the why or how behind what happened.

And I think if we begin to see that people are a reflection of who we are—the people with whom we feel most comfortable in our personal evolution—we also find comfort in knowing that change, both internal and external, can be thrilling rather than scary. It is common to think that one of the things we fear most about change is the people around us: the idea that they might leave if we change. And then there is the fear of staying the same when you know you are craving growth, but are afraid that if you do grow, those same people will not grow with you. But here is the thing: the people who are in your life are meant to teach you, be there for you, or not, and to complement the journey you are on. The beauty of your own evolution is that alongside witnessing your personal growth comes the freedom of seeing those around you and simply observing how they change too. There will be people with whom you are given the chance to witness change and evolution up close, and even take part in that inner exploration and learn alongside them, while others may be people you witness from afar. And of course, there are those with whom you experienced a version of them during the time they were present in your life, and who leave you wondering, at times, how their life is going.

I can say for myself that this aspect of my life—the one of relationships, of relating and observing, of complementing and letting go, of embracing personal growth and unintentional separation, and of becoming with others and witnessing the beautiful transformations we get to experience and later tell others about—is one of the most beautiful, chaotic, complex, and unique understandings I have come to embrace and appreciate. From accepting that a person in your life may trigger you to learn one of your biggest lessons and not be there to experience it with you, while another person comes in and helps you apply what you have learned; to teaching the hardships you have faced to newcomers through a different narrative that helps you find a lighter perspective and even shift your own. From being able to see how someone you love is growing, and knowing when to take a step back and allow them to find their way, while still being there when they are ready to come back and welcoming them with open arms. And the most beautiful one I have experienced is when

you become someone’s listening ear when they were once your shoulder to lean on.

These are the beauties of the people we encounter in our lives, and the fear that comes with not being with some of them can be daunting. But it also allows us to appreciate the moments we have with them, and to learn when it is time to let go and allow each person to go their own way.

I know it is hard to grasp all of this at first, and I can say that I have had my troubles—and still do at times—with love, friendships, relationships, communication, and also with letting go and embracing change. But with each person who has come in, stayed, left, taught, triggered, and helped me grow in any way, I feel blessed to have crossed paths with each and every one of them. And now I can say with certainty that I am excited to encounter new faces, to experience and create memories, and to allow the web of relationships to expand while others may fade. But each one gives me a chance to learn more about myself, just as I hope it gives me a chance to help and teach someone else. There is a blessing in each person we come across, and a lesson that helps make the journey more complex and memorable.

Z.