Paradox of Living

We place importance on things external to us to find a sense of control - a common driver for determining whether things are going as planned. But do we really know how things will unfold? Do we really have the ability to predict our future? Or better yet, do we have the certainty of how things will unfold for ourselves within the next hours, weeks, months, or years?

As we move through life, we may want to be more in control so we do not experience things we have already experienced in the past. But if that is the case, our growth is not necessarily about continuing to expand but about limiting ourselves from experiencing. If we assume that as we continue living, we will grow and be ever-changing, but we begin to fear more things through trauma or triggered memories, this can be seen as a paradox of living.

In essence, we can become someone who grows and remains stagnant by experiencing life to its fullest capacity, yet fearing life from truly revealing itself. If such is the paradox, the way to dissipate it can be through the mere assumption that we are capable of becoming someone different at every moment in our lives (even as you are reading this). The reason is that if our mind captures new material, it cannot degenerate to what it was and cannot assume that such learning never occurred. The obfuscation of our learning is a denial of our living. It is for this reason that if we are constantly in the desire to control all that is around, we will be limited in focusing on how we adapt and partake in the world that is around us. It is not the centredness of the self that will make us selfish; it is the desire to control all that is around for the sake of not wanting to assume responsibility for the actions we do have control over, or taking accountability for the actions that might not have aligned with who we have become after becoming aware that the way we behaved was not right in that moment.

Then again, the way to come back to oneself is through the understanding that we are only in control of ourselves, and for that, the main thing we must trust is ourselves. There is no knowing what might come, but there is a certainty in who we are now and the unpredictability of the future. And if there is one thing that you can control, it is choosing what you want to place value in and what you want to give importance to. This dynamic dance of choice and action, through trust and growth, is one that we will only really understand for ourselves. The reason for this individuality is the control that we must have over our lives. The dance then comes into question when we are interacting with the things around us. There may be times when one stumbles, but it is through practice and trust in the process of learning, failing, and finding rhythm that we will become better at it.

So why not find the dance of inner trust in the paradox of life? Choose to move in fluidity as you grow and remove the fears that have been placed along the way. Because as much as we fear something happening more than once in the exact way, that is quite improbable. However, if something similar happens but with different components, then there might be a repeated variable that should be addressed and changed - then ask yourself what that variable might be.

Z.