You know who you are.

Who are you? Who am I?

A question we come across, and come to doubt, especially when we compare ourselves to those around us. There is no right or wrong answer, only the one you choose to give to describe who you are when someone asks it. However, there are moments where we have this automated response, where labels or old narratives come to be the answer without giving much thought until you sit down and truly reflect on it and ask if it resonates. I think we get to a point where we question who we are when we behave in ways we don’t recognize or do things that don’t align. It is not to say that it is right or wrong; it can simply mean that you are not the person you thought would be in tune with that which you chose to do. 

I had come across this question several times,  thinking I had no idea of who I was, or a mere idea of who I was supposed to be. But this detachment or separation of how I identified myself became strange. I felt like I was in a constant search, reading books, watching videos, or simply doing things to discover more of who I was, as though I was meeting someone new. And don’t get me wrong, it was amusing for some time as I explored and experienced new things, but it left me with a feeling of emptiness. I felt like I was in that constant search, and it was leaving a void within, and I would always need to be looking for the next thing to be complete. 

However, it was a few weeks ago when I suddenly woke up one day, and in an inexplicable way, I simply rephrased and rewrote my current narrative. I was stuck with hope and doubt in striving to become this ideal version of myself without simply embracing who I am. I simply started saying: I know who I am, and I can make things happen. There was a sense of relief I felt, a weight that lifted off my shoulders in the simple knowing and clarity of staying present in who I am rather than seeking a version of myself that is not the one I am now. 

I don’t know if you have read the book “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle, but I highly recommend it. He mentions how time is the only thing that we have constructed that removes the aspect of living in the present. The desires of the future, and the memories of the past, which relate to the present version of yourself, are reminiscing at any given time. It is precisely this lesson which clarified how the way we interpret things, for whatever contexts, allows us to be that ideal version of who we are. It is not about separating the contexts of things, but understanding how they are all interrelated to each other. 

Once I allowed myself to start immersing myself in this presence, in the now, it allowed me to experience life as it is (knowing, of course, of deadlines or certain dates that are important to plan). Understanding this concept made me realize that who you are and who you want to be is a choice you make all the time. You must, however, accept things as they are. But even that acceptance and how you choose to see it or interpret it is how you can also see yourself. Once you see the patterns within your mind and how they perceive the world around, and how you relate to it, you can begin to make the shifts that you choose. And instead of asking who you are, because you know deep down, it is simply becoming aligned and attuned with the version of you that feels the emotions you seek (like compassion or love). Because if you continuously aim to define things related to you by your surroundings, then you will continuously strive to be fulfilled and complete by things separate from you. It is therefore important for you to start seeking all that you seek outside of yourself within. You might think this is challenging at first if you are not accustomed to it, but that too is a choice in thinking outside the box and going within to learn how you can do that. But you can for sure use what is around as tools to help you discover those emotions, like gratitude or expressing love. 

So, why not start embracing who you are by simply being one with yourself? What if you start filling your cup with all that you seek others to fill for you? What if you simply be and live with the acceptance that now is the only time you truly have, and choose to live it wisely and in alignment?

Z.